Flashback: Logic

Any morning before 6:30 a.m., only the heat pump makes noise, churning into action with a click, whirrr, followed by a continuous hum. Although the computer works all night, it makes no discernible noise in the basement. At 6:30, the alarm clock blares, the coffee pot gurgles, and the dog barks. At 6:30, the Doobel family awakens.

Papa Doobel, "Dick" to his friends, reaches to turn off the alarm clock which his wife had inadvertently switched to RADIO the night before. Mama Doobel climbs out of bed and shuffles to the kitchen to prepare breakfast. The children stir in their sleep but do not rise until Mama or Papa wakes them up.

As Papa fumbles for the OFF switch, he hears the following news update:

I’m not sure how to say this, folks, but last night our planet was taken over by a friendly conqueror. Do not panic, however, because these invaders are not aliens from another planet. They are a large network of computers that span our planet, the Moon, Mars and the bases in the Asteroid Belt. They call themselves EBT, Enterprise for a Better Tomorrow. According to a spokesman for EBT, all military offensive and defensive weapons have been disarmed as of midnight last night. EBT claims to have saved the solar system from complete destruction.

In sports news, the Icy Blues beat the Satellites by 2 light-minutes to take the Interplanetary Championship Relay Race.

Papa Doobel finds the switch and turns off the radio. He ponders the news he just heard as he goes into the bathroom to pee. "Hey kids! Time to get up!" he yells as he flushes the toilet and begins to wash his face. He calculates how many honeymoon trips to Mars he’ll be able to sell because of today’s news. "Enough to pay for next year’s vacation," he mumbles to himself.