Leave It to Me!

"Daddy, Daddy...please!"

"Bunny, I bought you a YouTube-compatible cell phone, a YouTube-compatible video camera and a PC with your own DSL connection."

"But Daddy, I want to be on the Internet...now!!!"

"Baby, you can use all the simple software tools I installed for you to put up and run a viral video in no time."

"Daddy! I want someone else to do it for me! The computer is SO-O-O boring. Besides, it takes away from my texting."

"Texting. Yeah, that's what I really pay for, isn't it? My all-in-one cell service plan lets me see the pre-season game scores once a week but it's yours and your sister's texting that's using all the data rate. Okay, pumpkin, what can I do for you?"

"I want to star in my own blog entry."

"Huh?"

"Please, Daddy! Please!"

"Which one?"

"Oh, just any one."

"Okay, how about this one?"

"This one?"

"Yes, you're already in this blog entry, cupcake."

"How did I get in here?"

"Well, when I celebrated the 400th anniversary of Galileo's telescope by gathering your boyfriends in the street to shoot fireworks the other night, it bought me this space."

"Wow! That's great!"

"Just remember, your whining and begging is also part of this blog entry. Unless you land a boyfriend who wants a spoiled brat for a future wife, this might not paint you in a good light."

"Daddy, it also makes you look like a pushover."

"That's fine."

"And I might tell them about the time you told me you cheated on your tests in college."

"Teddy bear, I never said that."

"Or the way you pad your expense accounts and rig your bonuses at work to be able to afford all the foreign cars in the driveway."

"Where are you getting all this information?"

"Well, Daddy, if you can say stuff about me that I think is not true, I can do the same about you."

"Oh, the stories we tell. You got your space on this blog. Are you happy?"

"For now."

"Just what I thought! Instead of college, let's get you an MRS degree. It'll be a lot cheaper for me! I won't be losing a daughter - I'll be gaining a bank account!"